"CandyIs dandyBut liquorIs quicker."

"A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold."

"Progress might have been all right once but it has gone on too long."

"When there are monsters there are miracles."

"Certainly there are things in life that money can't buy, but it's very funny -Did you ever try buying them without money?"

"Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them."

"Prejudice is the Child of Ignorance."

"Would you please shut up and sit down!"

"I dwell in possibility..."

"Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all."

"It's so much more friendly with two."

"In the U.S. you have to be a deviant or exist in extreme boredom... Make no mistake, all intellectuals are deviants in the U.S."